20 October 2008

haircuts

I haven't gotten a haircut since August 31, and I got that when I went home for a football game. But I have something important tomorrow so decided to go out in the big city of Athens, and find a barber shop.

It was pretty hard to do. All the barber shops I found downtown were white barbers, and where I'm from black people cut black people hair and white people cut white people hair. Maybe that's just my town, but I didn't want to chance a haircut and decided to keep looking.

Well I eventually find one on Macon highway, about three miles from my dorm and I really believe I was meant to get a haircut there. I walked in and the guy greeted me, and started cutting my hair. He asks me some questions, I told him some answers and that led to him showing me the magazine he publishes.

I'm going to school to become a graphic designer and he needs some interns for his magazine, so now I have a connection and maybe even a job. I guess only time will tell.

18 October 2008

homecoming

This week has been homecoming here at UGA. There's been several different events that everyone could participate in and concluded in the football game today against Vanderbilt. We won, but I guess the one i was most excited about was the concert with T-Pain.

I was apprehensive about going to it at first, but caved in at the end. This would be my first concert ever, and i feel like this will follow me for the rest of my life. How can i tell my kids my first concert was T-Pain. No offense to him, i think he's one of the most talented people in the world and has changed the game completely. I mean if you can influence Kanye West to make a whole album singing using the vocoder then you deserve your place in history. I mean he as on thirty-seven songs in one year.

But i still didn't want this to be my first concert of my life, yet i still went. It was suppose to begin at eight but it didn't start until a quarter to nine. T-Pain didn't start performing until around nine and it as over a lil' after ten. So i wouldn't even consider it a real concert. Maybe an apperance.

The show was good, it couldv'e been a lot better, but it was worth the free price of admission so its not like i'm upset. He had these two guys with face paint on that were suppose to "dance" around the stage the whole time, but i don't think you can call what they did dancing so maybe they were just stage props. But other than that it was good.

The only thing i wish was that he would have performed more of his new stuff, and actually performed one whole song instead of snippets of songs he's made or appeared on.

school is for losers

Its been a couple of weeks since everything happened in the last post. K was sent to some medical place and was put on suicide watch, but she finally got out and the first thing she tells me is she wants to drop out of college. Her excuse is she's failing too many classes and wants to withdraw and go back in January and have a fresh record.

For me this is the dumbest thing she could do. If she drops out i feel as if she's not going back, and then what would she do. Sit at home. Smoke some weed. Die. Who could know for sure, but i seriously doubt that she'll make in back in the spring. Guess only time will tell.

and then there was death

I wrote this a couple of weeks ago but didn't know what to do with it so here it is.

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Life is such a precious thing that we never really think about too much, at least i don't, but i just received a shocking message. My best friend, k, may be dead. Supposedly she started cutting her wrsit and took a bunch of pills. I'm kinda speechless and can't fall asleep so here i am laying out my sould for the world to see.

K has been going through some things this year and i feel as if the only reason she didn't crack was because i was there to balance out everything. Here's the thing with k, our senior year of high school was tough for everyone. And i guess at our job we had, we started doing things that you shouldn't do. Most of our coworkers were either drug dealers or they smoked, so it shouldn't really be surprising that every now and again we would go along for a right and get high too.

Basically after December of 07 i stopped, she didn't. She moved from one addiction to the next, so that was problem one. Problem two, k, came out to me one night in December while I was at work. I wasn't shocked and it didn't really phase me, it only made me think about the past six years and a lot of things were clarified for me. So now this girl that i had fell in love with was a bisexual, no big deal right?

Wrong, we live in this very small town where you just don't do that. So basically for the rest of the school year we had to keep this under wrap, and i guess after we graduated they went buck wild. Her girlfriend was already pregnant so that just added to all the issues she was already going through. But when her grandmother found out I guess that just flipped her world upside down. She was kicked out and shortly after graduation moved to Atlanta with her mom.

On top of all of that k had always been a Clark Atlanta panther at heart. I couldn't count the days when she would tell me she was going to CAU or cow as i called it on a daily basis. Unfortunately CAU is a private school and tuition is 39,000 and since she didn't get hope (another long story for another short day) there was no way she could attend the school of her dream.So she was forced to go to Fort Valley State University which smells like crazy in the old dorms.

So with all of this crushing her down can I say I'm surprised that she tried to kill herself. No I can't say I am. This isn't the first time she's cut herself. K was a cutter throughout middle school, and during our brief relationship even showed up with a cut shaped into the letter of my name. So i'm not surprised I'm just shocked that it came to this, and will probably be sitting here for a while thinking. What can i do all the way in Athens.

the real best friend

In my lifetime i've had several best friends, some stayed around longer than others. Some i still keep in contact with others ended on bad terms and i wish them hell. But there's been one in particular that has been here since grade six.

I never knew our relationship would last this long. We been through a whole lot of shit together, but it always ends up being me and her in the end. Lets call this girl, k, for the simple fact that i like single letter names and plan on naming my first born Upton, and calling him U.

But yea, me and k met back in 2001, a few weeks before the attacks and have been friends since. We have had our rough patches, one of the worst happened after we tried dating back in the eight grade. It didn't really end well and she became annoying, even though she broke up with me. But still we kinda fell out and things were never the same until high school.

Now four years later its still me and her. I still love her and she loves me, and constantly jokes that we're going to get married one day. I can actually see that happening because we just share something special. Maybe its the fact that she's so controlling, but now i won't just do what she says and then she gets angry, and she's just so damn cute when she mad.

school

i guess to know me, you have to understand me. i grew up the first four years of my life all over the states. Not many people know this about me, not even my friend knows this. My dad was in the military and though i don't remember moving around i have pictures that show me in all these different places.

Well around age four me, my mother, and older brother moved back to Georgia and i started school. When i was seven we moved again to my hometown where my mom and i were both born. Its a very small town that no one i ever meet knows where it is, so yea. Its a very boring place full of rednecks and thugs i guess you could say or whatever but yea moving on.

Ten years later i turn eighteen graduate from high school, one of the only black honor graduates, and get accepted to the University of Georgia. Its the only school i applied to so I'm happy I'm here. Things are going okay and i just changed my major to graphic design. Nothing much more to say.

17 October 2008

inebriated beginnings

I'm not new to this. I've had several blogs in the past, and a couple of them were pretty successful. Yet after a month or two I always ended up leaving them. I get to a point where I never have anything to write, or have something to say but became afraid someone I know may find the blog and read it. But not anymore, at this point in my life I could care less what anyone thinks.

I'm at a point in my life where I'm starting to see who really cares about me. I'm starting to realize where I want to be in five, ten, fifty years from now. I know who are my real friends, they're the ones that i keep in contact with even though we're hundreds of miles away. My best friend since the sandbox goes to the same university as me, and we never speak. We never just hang out or go catch a lunch or something.

I don't blame him, and I don't blame myself. I blame time. We grew apart in high school. I mean I'm just this atypical black kid and his family is basically worshiped by the town, what did we expect to happen. We talk whenever we see each other, its just not the friendship e had back in 97 when we would trade baseball cards while everyone else would go to recess.

But at least we're not at a point where we won't ever be in contact. So I guess that's enough information for a first post, guess I'll catch you up on my history at a later date. But welcome to my life, don't let all the inebriation distract you.