11 July 2009

i wish...

...i could lay next to you.
...i could tumble every moment i think of you.
...i could get rid of this feeling.
...i wasn't pushing myself away from you.

just some wishful thinking i needed to get out of my system. but for some reason i suddenly feel depressed now. mostly because i'm thinking of you. i don't even know what this feeling is. i just know i felt the same thing for three months when i was obsessing over Al. the only way to describe it is it feels like a whale being pushed into a small can, while a war is going on in the background. i can't think clearly. i'm not motivated to do anything. my heart feels like its about to explode, my chest is cloudy, and my head feels like someone is constantly pounding it on the ground like they're trying to break open a piggybank.

if it wasn't for the miraculous return of mark and the EPIC, gut-busting makeup sex with robby i probably would've disappeared by now.
currently listening to Have You Ever by Brandy

BUT YEAH,

i guess my next post is the big 300. thought about doing something special and i still might, but i probably won't. but i've finally decided that i'm gonna do the "where you blog" game thats been floating around like wildfire. i've been tagged three times so i guess i have no choice.

3 comments:

Aek said...

*Hugs*

I'm still here too. :) I wish I could've had epic make-up sex with ya. o.O

Randy said...

SHHHH! I TOL U NOT TO TELL NO ONE!

ScaredTriumph! said...

OMG :'D

I LOVE YOU!!!!

I'm glad I'm seeing this post now. It makes me feel better about the pile of putrid, steaming, screaming shit that's just been dumped on my life recently.